Now that Holden is in daycare, I am learning about a new little world. It is funny to think of this whole new tiny solar system. The daycare workers are the mini-stars and we all revolve around them. The two of us are just learning about the system and our place inside of it. I wonder how it will seem when we are familiar with its inner workings.
I suppose the studio is it own universe, and our little home is a teeny circular buzz of energy bumping into the bigger spheres of the studio, Mysore, and our friends and family.
I remember practicing at another studio many years ago, a woman told me that she liked me because I was nice – even though I didn’t have to be because David was a teacher. Hahahaha!
It stuck with me, because I always thought I had to be nice to people because my husband is a yoga teacher. Well, no really, it stuck with me because it was interesting how insular and sometimes a bit twisted our worlds can become. Which is why it is good to have a couple tops spinning at the same time.
Cheers to new tops, new irons in the fire, new solar systems discovered.
Also, I like new moon days.
Holden went to daycare yesterday. I stayed with him, but he was fine. He ate tomato soup with a spoon in a chair. That night he decided to stop breastfeeding. This means two things:
1. I can go away for a night in the near future. Yay!!
2. I am non-essential services. Sob!
Although, that said, his dad gave him an open can of coconut water to pour all over himself 5 minutes before we had to leave to go to daycare. So, I might be useful for the next year or so.
My husband is becoming someone who gets quoted. People who like to justify drinking quote Oscar Wilde, and people who like to justify crazy Ashtanga practices quote David. Sadly, fewer people are interested in getting up at the crack of dawn to torture themselves, than people who are interested in getting up at noon after a night of binge drinking only to feel tortured. Although, having done both – I understand the appeal.
Here are a couple of good quotes that I stole from this article:
“Admire the work, not the practice”
“Integrating yoga into your life makes everything else all the more possible.”
Here is one that Indians like, “I am 40 years old. I’m from the West. What do I know about yoga?”
My recent favourite quote, upon walking into a polling station on election day:
“Stan, brace yourself. This room is filled with people who only work one day a year.”
The other day I saw a Facebook update with a David quote – but it wasn’t attributed to anyone. And I thought. holy shit. He is becoming the “they’ in “That’s what they say.”
I will leave you with another classic:
“Looking at the water and eating chocolate isn’t perverted.”
Its official, yo!
Holden went to his first concert last month, Yo Gabba Gabba. He was momentarily scared when the confetti fell from the ceiling, but he had a great time looking at al the kids, dancing in the aisles and playing with the glow stick that his dad bought him. His sister even ordered him a concert t-shirt with his name on it, which he won’t wear that often in the park. Just in case he gets lured away by someone with a grilled cheese sandwich or whatever else we are depriving him of.
Tonight, I am sewing Holden Owl labels onto his clothes so that he is ready for daycare next week. Also, tonight he ate his entire dinner by himself, mostly with a spoon and he didn’t even really need my help taking sips from his regular glass of water.
Eating a with a fork? Drinking from a cup? Going to concerts and needing his clothes labeled? He is totally growing up. How can he grow up when I am still such a baby? How does that work?
Anyway, here is a little taste of Yo Gabba Gabba, from their “I like to Dance” Tour.
No, don’t clickity click this. Don’t. Unless you want all your waking hours to be set to DJ Lance Rock’s lame beats.
p.s. Muno is his favourite.
I have been following the Arab Spring and Occupy movements for a while now. It is kind of exciting. I was also really excited by the whole Battle in Seattle movement that went on a decade ago with the Black Block and all the kids would gear up to go the rock concerts protests and get tear gassed.
It does feel timely. I mean – how long are people going to pour concrete down the pipes of their repossessed homes before they start thinking about another approach. I was thinking about all this, the protests and how it relates to my practice and my politics.
I’m not trying to say that practicing yoga in my cozy Toronto studio is peaceful protest. I am aware of my incredibly good fortune to have the opportunity to practice everyday. And, I have always been quite irked when a yoga teacher will tell the class that they made the world a better place by practicing. You make the world a better place by working to make the world a better place. Maybe practice can help you in your efforts, but resting on the fact that you do yoga isn’t really enough. Actually, it is a bit like going to yoga class, rolling out your mat and not taking the class. Which leads me to what I wanted to say…
We work so hard at our edge everyday on the mat. Maybe you don’t, but I know that I confront anger, sadness, discomfort, frustration, boredom as well as elation and joy. I can’t be doing all that work on the mat just so that I can go home, do my laundry and be irritated at the fridge repairman. I mean, maybe I will be nicer to the repair guy on the phone because I practiced, which will be nice for him – but I think there is a higher purpose.
I do find the practice makes me a bit insular in other ways. I like to be home for dinner, and go to bed at a certain time. I don’t like to expend too much energy at night so that I can be well rested for the early morning. I think sometimes the regularity can make me a little too conditioned and rigid about going out of my comfort zone, because practice is so uncomfortable. And then stuff happens like OccupyTo or whatever and I just feel like curling up and watching 30 Rock.
I was listening to this thing today about sales and how you have to think about what your customer needs and wants. It is lame that it was couched in terms of how you could benefit – but I thought – what if all businesses thought a lot about what their customers needed and how to make their lives more fulfilling? What if I really thought about how to help other people achieve their dreams and goals, and in turn recognized how supportive my friends and family are in helping me reach mine?
Maybe the ambiguous OccupyTO politics don’t sit right with you, and fair enough. I would like to go downtown and lend my support. But also, I want to renew my efforts to really listening to the interests of my community and my family.
David is in CPH, but not me. And while I am happy to not be on a plane with the baby, it makes me a bit sad that I don’t get to spend time there and see all the great peeps we met last year.
We Skyped yesterday, and he told me about his day.
David: I ate a chocolate bar today.
Stan; Good for you.
D: Yeah, I went down to the water and walked around. And I ate a chocolate bar.
S: Well, there is only one of you.
D: I felt like a pervert. I mean, it isn’t perverted to look at the water and eat chocolate. But I felt like a pervert. Do you know what I mean?
It is a funny feeling when you are so used to being around other people and all of a sudden you are not. I felt like that a bit when I went out for the first time without the baby. I had gone to the hardware store, just a few blocks from my house. When I went in there, everyone treated me like a regular human being. No one held the door, or let me go ahead of them in line or helped me pick something up. After 9 months of pregnancy and then a month of caring around this little thing, I suddenly felt distinctly unspecial. I almost announced to the cashier, “I have a baby!”
Now I enjoy going out without the baby and being all regular again. I like helping moms who are struggling with their strollers or the door or whatever. I have also become that creepy person who asks strange moms a million questions about their kids, “How old is she? What size shoe does she wear? Oh yeah, is she walking yet? How does she sleep?” I am such a nightmare.
My shoulder feels better worse better. I am still blaming the baby, although I have a feeling I should blame my hunchback.
My friend Genesee lives up north. Well, she used to live up north, and now she lives in the Arctic, which is past “up north” and “the bush” and into a whole new chilly universe. When she just lived up north, she had a neighbour who got in a fight with his family. The family all built homes close to each other, and I forget the story – either he was left out of the will or he was too crazy to build his own house or something. Anyway. there were three big houses in the middle of nowhere and then this guy.
He decided to live out in the bush. He put together two tarps, and had some kind of heater. At some point he convinced some Americans who owned a hunting lodge that he could look after their home in the winter. He sold off their belongings and claimed squatter’s rights. But that was short lived and he was back with the tarps.
I’m not sure where he is now, but Genesee did mention to me that he shot her cat. Not sure where that fits in the timeline.
That is my theory about Yetis. People who for some reason get pushed out, or who spiral out themselves. Genesee was always nervous about Wendigos – which are a bit like super evil Yetis – taking the form of people you know, Wendigos appear on cold winter nights and eat you up.
Sometimes I think of Wendigos when the weather gets cold and we begin to snuggle up in our homes. We live in such a big lonely country. I wonder how far out we can travel before the tarps come out and we can’t come back in without hurting people. I think we like to pretend that shelter is a right in Canada, but really it is a privilege.
Here is picture of me, basking in my own personal privilege and also stretching out my neck a bit. Holden has decided he likes bottles in the past month. He wouldn’t even look at a bottle for the first 14 months of his life and he can now almost drink from a regular cup by himself. I have no idea what changed. Hurray regression.
Last week, Mercedes found an article in the Globe and Mail that stated scientists in Russia were 95% certain of the existence of Yetis. I was surprised it had made it to the Globe. Anyway, a bunch of people spent a bunch of money on a conference and now apparently there is irrefutable evidence that for some reason seems remarkably circumstantial to anyone outside of that group. One woman from Michigan said that she was always convinced because a family of Yetis live in her backyard. I’m not sure what her backyard looks like, but the only possible yeti hiding spot in my backyard is a small shed. The shed might house very small yetis. It smells nice in there, and if they live there – I feel badly for storing my bike and Holden’s kiddie pool. But whatever, they don’t pay rent.
I tried looking up the article again, so that I could share it with you. But now I can’t find it anywhere on the Globe site. Woo! Creepy! This means that yetis are at work at the Globe as well as in Siberia, and in the backyards of Michigan residents.
Holden has some ABC flash cards with animals and Y is for yeti.
She looks cute and friendly and not really adverse to being photographed. Please send me photos if you have one of Shaka’s brethren on your property.
I am having a little a shoulder trouble lately. Bummer. Mostly, it is because the baby is 25 lbs, he likes being cuddled constantly, rocked to sleep, and for some reason changing arms just feels wrong.
Having a little injury, I find I am so quick to get frustrated and impatient. It is a time when I have to be extra gentle and thoughtful towards myself, but also take responsibility for the way I am feeling. Funny how the urge to blame (notice how I totally blamed the baby in the above paragraph!) is quite strong. Hopefully, it will feel better soon and I won’t have to do anything crazy like change arms.
Or maybe that goddamn lazy yeti family squatting in my shed will help me cart him around.
The longer you wait to do something, the worse it becomes. And then people start asking, “When are you going to do that thing you do?” But you still don’t do it. And then people stop asking. And when someone does ask, other people answer for you, “Oh she doesn’t do that anymore.” and you start to wonder – do I do that anymore? Did I enjoy it? Why did I stop? Should I wait until I feel like it, or just do it despite my mood?
Anyway, I am sorry for being a bad blogger. I am also sorry that my last post was three months ago and it employed the totally cheap-ass blogger tactic of a quote with a few pictures of a baby. Lame.
This morning I was listening to David and Mercedes talk about a private student that Mercedes just took on. Mercedes mentioned that she had told her to practice three times a week and asled of that was OK. David said, “Tell her everyday and then she will balk, and then you tell her to do as much as she can. Do less more frequently.”
I resolve to approach my blog like a bad ashtangi. I am going to blog three days a week. NIce short blogs.
See, look I’m done already.
Oh, wait – have you seen this movie? Holden is in it, and it sounds a bit like child abuse when EK filmed the bit about us going to the studio in the morning. My mother-in-law says it is awfully long, even though it is about her son. Shrug. I like it. Especially the Holden bit.http://www.vimeo.com/26696506
Oh, and David says he wants you to come to Kino. Actually, you really should if you live in Toronto. People like to get in a tizzy about her short shorts and her role as a popularizer of the ashtanga tradition. I really like her. She is the real deal. Super sweet, generous with her time and energy, a gifted adjuster, and an incredibly knowledgeable teacher. And she looks good in those shorts.
See you this week.